Google Gulp - Quench your thirst for knowledge.
Monday, June 8, 2009
, Posted by Author at Monday, June 08, 2009
"a DNA scanner embedded in the lip of your bottle reading all 3 gigabytes of your base pair genetic data in a fraction of a second, fine-tuning your individual hormonal cocktail in real time using our patented Auto-Drink™ technology, and slamming a truckload of electrolytic neurotransmitter smart-drug stimulants past the blood-brain barrier to achieve maximum optimization of your soon-to-be-grateful cerebral cortex."
Sounds like a Sci-Fi movie set in 2050? naaa, Its an energy fruit drink from Google. Google!!!. Yes, Google Gulp (BETA)™ is a line of "smart drinks" designed to maximize surfing efficiency by making you more intelligent, and less thirsty. And its the first drink with the BETA tag. Its available in four flavors - Beta Carroty - cancer-fighting carotenoid, Glutamate Grape - Enhancing your learning and memory functions, Sugar-Free Radical - antioxidant-rich, low-cal beverage keep you young forever and Sero-Tonic Water - blend of selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors.
What's more, through the real-time DNA-scanning process, Auto-Drink™, Google Gulp takes a picture of your genetic profile, reconfigure its molecular composition on the fly, and subtly alter your brain's intricate mosaic of axonial patterns in order to facilitate even faster cognitive processing. Now, what does that means? Is Google now collecting our genetic information too! What will they do with it? Genetically personalized search results, lol! If you don't want your genetic data to be on google's database, just turn off the Auto-Drink on your Google Gulp preferences page.
For further details on google gulp, head on to google.com/googlegulp
Have you taken a gulp yet? Any experiences?
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